Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Babies Babies Everywhere

     My step-daughters are coming up to go to the haunted zoo and some other fun filled family Halloween events.  I love love love taking them, we were frequent visitors at the local Children's Museum, the Zoo, a local dinosaur exhibit and a few other family attractions this summer when I stayed at home with them.
     One of the things all these places have in common is babies! I warn anyone with baby fever to avoid these areas, granted the grocery store is always full of babies too.  I wandered through the Children's Museum for hours with the girls, no big deal, just babies, but the day we went when AF reared her ugly head it was like everything was magnified. 
    Don't get me wrong, I'm very happy to have two amazing stepdaughters who are so smart and creative, but I really want a little bundle of joy I can call my own.  The day of AF we went to a princess tea party (it should be noted, I hate princess stuff, I always have even as a child but I muster up a ton of enthusiasm for the two of them) and I was seated with the other parents while they went up to have a tea party with princess Belle.
    Three women in front of me were sitting together all holding tiny sweet little infants who would coo and drool over their shoulder at me.  It hurts a little bit to see all those sweet chubby little cheeks and realize I don't even know when it will happen, at this point I'm not sure I can be sure in how it will happen even.
    I'm so happy for all of my friends that are moms or soon-to-be moms, but I can't help being jealous.  I look at them cradling their little ones and being so at ease soothing and rocking their little ones.  I want that so badly, to have a little one with my nose or maybe my eyes (okay, I honestly hope they get my husband's nose) that I can love and be there for and watch grow. 
    I'm still hoping, still keeping positive, and still dreading that one year deadline that keeps inching its way closer.  For all you ladies out there TTC, keep your head up and your heart open. 

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